


You Blind Me

by thedarkestdaisy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: BAMF Darcy Lewis, Bruce Banner Is a Good Bro, F/M, Steve Rogers is Not a Virgin, Steve Rogers is a little shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-04-30 14:44:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5167736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedarkestdaisy/pseuds/thedarkestdaisy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy concerns Steve when she starts acting strange. </p>
<p>Well, strang-er</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Speedy Depatures

Parts of the team is gathered in Tony's living-room. Pepper and Tony are curled on the couch, eyes plastered to the giant plasma screen where Jack and Rose are running around the lower quarters of the Titanic. Clint and Natasha are playing Trivia Crack against each other on their phones while Thor and Jane absent-mindedly stuff their faces with popcorn. Darcy, Bucky, Sam and Steve are gathered at the glass coffee table with a game of checkers set up between Steve and Darcy. Steve is glaring down at the board.

 

“Aren't you suppose to be some master tactician?” Bucky teases him from his side. “This is starting to look a little sad.” It makes Darcy snort which make him lose his focus all over again. He forces himself to take an even breath and let it be. Darcy and Bucky are perfect for each other. He wants his friend to be happy. Even if it's Darcy that makes Bucky happy. Because Bucky deserves something good like Darcy after all the things he's had to deal with. Bucky flashes her a wink, pleased with the reaction he draws from her.

 

“Darcy is just really good at checkers,” Sam says as he digs his elbow into her ribs until she squirms away with a grin. “Undefeated House Champion.”

 

She is and it makes Steve kind of admire her. Darcy's got all but five of his red pieces and she's not being sweet about it. She keeps tapping her fingers on the little pile of them and humming the Queen song she had him listen to earlier this month. He only has four of her pieces- because most of hers have been kinged long ago and now it's just a game of chicken with his pieces moving between a total of three spaces back and forth.

 

“C'mon Steve. You're not gonna be able to fight your way out of this one. Just admit it: I win.” Her smile is cheeky and he can practically feel Bucky melt at the sight of it next to him. 

 

“Oh. My. Self.” Tony groans from the couch. “Could you four stop flirting with each other and shut up for a full five seconds? Jack is about to draw Rose like one of his french girls. It's my second favorite part of this movie and if you ruin it- actually Steve you should probably get your little black book out and write down a few pointers.”

 

Steve frowns and turns to face Tony. “Tony, I don't need pointers. I'm twenty-six years old. Sex hasn't changed in the last seventy years.”

 

“Yes it has, choir boy. There's more than one position now. Write that down. Look it up. You're welcome. Be quiet,” he orders before turning back to the television while simultaneously cuddling further into Pepper's side.

 

“Fine. I was about to win anyways.” Steve mumbles to the crowd around the table.

 

“You were not, Captain Liar.” Darcy hisses at him and then practically flinches when Natasha shushes her from her perch on the loveseat. While she's glaring at Natasha Steve makes the decision to sweep his arm across the board, spilling checker pieces all over the soft beige carpet. She gasps as she looks down at the floor while Sam crawls into the kitchen choking on laughter. “You little bitch! I so had you cornered!”

 

“Guess we'll never know now, huh sweetheart?” Steve shrugs his shoulders and grins at Bucky as the other man tries to hide his smile behind a metal fist. 

 

“Does America know you're this much of a little shit?” She shoots him a withering glare before crawling over to the love seat to slot herself in between Natasha and Clint who bro-fists her when she gives him a right answer. His eyes track and settle on her for nearly the entire movie. Bucky spreads himself out on the floor next to him and is immediately taken with the movie but Steve can't help but sneak little glances at her from time to time. 

 

He likes the way she bites her bottom lip when things go to hell on screen and the way her eyes tear up when the old couple hold each other in bed as the water rises around them. Bucky stands muttering something about seeing too much ice in his lifetime and how this movie is just a giant cryfest. Before Bucky turns to go into the kitchen he nudges Steve's knee and jerks his head in a “follow me” motion before wandering off.

 

With one last glance at Darcy huddled under Clint's arm as she taps answers on his screen he unfolds himself from the floor and follows after Bucky.

 

Sam is dumping another bag of popcorn into a big plastic bowl when they enter. “Don't look at me like that. I'm hungry” He shoots them a baleful glare before grabbing a water bottle off the marble counter and stalking out of the room. 

 

Steve ignores him and opens up the door to the fridge before pulling out a platter of fresh cut vegetables and a tub of ranch dip. Bucky's face folds in disgust as he dips carrot after carrot in the dip.

 

“Do you put ranch on everything now, Rogers?” Bucky goes about making a bowl of cereal around the kitchen, pulling things out of the cupboards and refrigerator.

 

“Did you really bring me in here to discuss my eating habits?” Steve asks while crunching down on a small stick of celery.

 

“Actually I wanted to ask if you were interested in Darcy.” Bucky says conversationally. His voice says indifference but the way his eyes are tracking the smallest hints of uncomfortable movement from him tells him that Bucky is serious and paying very close attention to the subtle cues in his reaction.

 

It's hard not to let it show because the answer is actually yes. Yes, he's interested in Darcy. He's captivated by her. Admittedly, the first few times he was in her presence he thought she was an annoying creature following Dr. Foster around as some science sidekick. But after several (eavesdropping on) conversations with the rest of the team and hearing about their interactions with he he had no choice but to warm up to the curvy lady. She was taking care of more than just Dr. Foster after she arrived to the tower.

 

He'd found that Tony was being forced to actually go up to the penthouse and sleep after she overwrote his programs and had the power source to his lab cut off. He honestly has no idea how she managed that but he thinks she must've had some help from a desperate Pepper and Jarvis. After a full month of Bruce sulking around the common rooms and labs he was surprised when Darcy came up to the kitchenette and interrupted Bruce and Sam's conversation by handing the man a Starkphone and demanding him to, “Just call her, okay? It's a secure line and she's only got a few minutes before she has to go back out but just talk to her. And tell her you're sorry.” before turning on her heal and leaving. If Steve noticed Bruce seeking out Natasha more often he didn't say anything to make it obvious to anyone else.

 

One day, when Thor was off in another world he learned that she had forcefully dragged Jane away from her lab and had Sam sit on her in the common living room while she made grilled cheese and tomato soup for the three of them. He'd panned on stealing a carton of eggs to make omelets for him and Bucky that night for dinner but was instead greeted by the sight of the three of them sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table while watching a British television show about people who work in IT. She smiled at him and waved goodbye as he left to trace his way back to his rooms.

 

And finally, when she cautiously took a new reinvented Bucky Barnes into her group of misfit toys. When Steve and Natasha were called away to help Coulson with a problem in Greece he was worried about Bucky until four days of being in cover when Natasha pulled her phone out that night and showed him a picture of Bucky with a crooked frown getting ready to take a bite of pie. What had him shocked the most was that somehow Darcy had managed to slip under the skin of his weathered and torn best friend enough to convince the man it would be a good idea to go on a day long road trip through upstate New York searching for the best slice of pie. Later that night when Natasha showed him another picture of Darcy, Bucky and a mangled street cat softly held in his friend's metal arm Steve's unease ebbed away. And he asked Natasha to send the last picture to him.

 

By the time she and Clint dragged everyone out to a bar in New Jersey for a week-cation- according to Darcy, while the Fantastic Four could do some heavy lifting for once in their stupid dramatic lives- according to Tony, he was already head over heels in love with her. The charming way she drew people in as if they were shy cats hiding under a bed of issues. How she always seemed to know when and correctly how to help the people around her. All the times she made him snort quietly to himself as he listened in on conversations where her lack of filter had people scurrying for an appropriate response. All of it made her perfect in his eyes. He couldn't stop thinking about her.

 

He knew she was the perfect kind of woman for a broken man. The kind of woman who wouldn't be a crutch but a stitch, holding things together until everything was healed.

 

She was the perfect kind of woman for Bucky. 

 

“Nope,” he said clearing his throat and striving to maintain eye contact. “She's all yours Bucky.”

 

Wow, he did not think that would be so hard to say outloud. Bucky must catch on to something in his face because his gaze narrows on him.

 

“If you say so...” Bucky shrugs once before tucking into his bowl of Wheaties.

 

Before he can respond the swish of the elevators catch his ears and he can hear Bruce Banner's erratic voice.

 

“Darcy can I speak to you for a second? Right now? At this moment?” Steve rears back from the bar and walks out into the living room, Bucky hot on his heels.

 

“Oh. Holy shit." Her eyes are suddenly wide and her mannerisms are wild. "Okay, coming. Lemme just… gather a few things.” She says before throwing herself off the couch and scrabbling around the room to gather her Starkphone and charger. After sliding on her black Keds and rushing out after Bruce.

 

Everyone is staring at the down in wonder and confusion.

 

“Weird. Ominous and weird.” Clint says evenly before continuing the game on his phone.

 

Bucky looks to Jane but she shrugs her shoulders in puzzlement.

 

Steve continues to gaze at the door, a bubbling uncomfort filling his stomach.


	2. Of Lies and Spies

Steve and Bucky walk back to the tower after their morning 13k through Central Park. He wants to ask Bucky if he's seen Darcy in the last four days because he hasn't seen her around at all. 

But then that runs the risk of bring up the Darcy Topic all together. And for some incredibly obvious reason he's decided to completely ignore he'd really rather just let things fall where they may between his best friend and the loveliest woman he's ever met. He's thought about it long and hard. He had his chance with Peggy and he chose a different path. But Bucky deserves this. He's worthy of Darcy.

But that doesn't mean Steve wants to talk about. So instead he asks about something else.

“Have you seen Tony at all the past few days?” He slows his pace to piss off a business who is yelling at someone on a cellphone behind them. Bucky snorts when the man growls at them before making a wide detour around the two of them. “I don't think anything's wrong. It's just usually I get an insult a day from the guy and he's kinda slacking.”

“If you're actually asking me if I've noticed a significant lack of his annoying presence- then yes, I have.” Bucky rolls his eyes. “Can't say I'm complaining about it though.”

Tony and Bucky aren't really on the best of terms. Ever since Coulson and Maria cleared Bucky to go out in the field Bucky has had a place at the tower. Steve realizes that it's painful to house the supposed killer of your parents but he's thankful Tony can look beyond that. Because Steve is pretty sure he'd leave all of them behind for Bucky. 

Except one.

He briefly wonders what she's doing right now. Steve eyes the tower in the distance among several smaller, equally great buildings and tries to picture her waking up. He knows when she wakes up she needs at least one hour of silence and two cups of sugar-flavored coffee. He's made the mistake of trying to talk to her while she was dumping obscene amounts of flavored creamer in her coffee and all she could really respond with was heavy-lidded eyes and grunts.

“In fact, there's been an odd feeling just all over the place.” Bucky fiddles with the zipper of the hooded sweatshirt with his thumb. “My gut has always been on the nose about stuff like this. I just don't know what it is. Feel like we should be keeping a closer eye on the labs.”

“Tony?” Steve perks up and shakes his head. “Tony's always got his hand in something. If it's not harming anyone I like to not be aware of it. You know, deniability and all that.”

“Nah. Talking about Banner. He's been deviating from his usual routine.” Steve ponders this new information. Bruce hasn't done anything lately to get on his radar. The man is probably the most rational and sane of everyone on the team- even if he has uncontrollable rage issues. 

“Such as?” When Steve asks Bucky to explain the man's shoulders droop a bit like he doesn't really want to expound upon his thoughts but he does it anyways. 

“You know I don't go to sleep some nights?” Steve nods and he continues making sure to stare straight ahead, he knows this is not a subject Bucky like to talk about. “It's hard going to sleep. I worry that I won't wake up sometimes or that I'll wake up and I won't remember who I am or what I did earlier that day. So instead of going to sleep I walk around that tower. There's over fifty floors I have access to so I just kind of memorize and roam around. I go to the labs sometimes to see if Darcy is still stuck on something with Foster. But lately Darcy hasn't been there. She's been spending most of her days in Bruce's lab.”

“What?” Steve stops mid-step and turns to Bucky forcing the man to stop as well. Passerbys make a fluid detour around them. “She helps manage the labs for Jane and Bruce all the time. That's nothing new.” It's nothing new but it still doesn't feel right in his stomach.

“Look. I know I haven't been around long enough to know the ins and outs of the Peanut Gang but I doubt Darcy Lewis knows anything about gamma radiation or transcribing notes about epigenetic modification.”

“What's epigenetic modification?” Steve's brow purses, the words are familiar but hold no meaning to him. Like he read them before but the words never mattered. Bucky rolls his eyes up heavenward and sighs.

“It's like the engineering of DNA. Only not naturally. It's how you became a beefcake who could throw cars into other cars.”

“Darcy understands all _that_? I have a hard time wrapping _my_ head around all that. I always thought she just made sure they didn't die from dehydration and sleep deprivation.” 

“Yup. And you see, that's the part that doesn't make sense.” Bucky crosses his arms and continues walking. “The doors to the labs are locked. Jarvis can't or is unwilling to get any feeds from the security cameras. I know Stark is uptight about his science buddies and their research but that's just ridiculous. And I think she's right in the middle of it. What's a girl who is practically a college drop out doing working with a couple PhD’s on theoretical science?”

“Okay.” Steve nods tensely. “You've got my attention. We can ask Darcy about it tonight at dinner. If anyone knows what's going on in the labs it's her.”

“Unless she's part of what's going on and it's some big secret. Everything feels like a big secret nowadays. Must be why everyone hates each other, ya know? Secrets don't make friends.” Bucky adds with a frown as two joggers nearly run into each other while staring at Steve who is lost in his own thoughts and completely oblivious to the two females. “We're gonna have to start putting a trash bag on you otherwise people are gonna accidentally start wandering off in traffic while staring at you. Don't think I don't know you're not doing it on purpose.”

“Huh?” Steve rears back to look at Bucky, thrown with the sudden change in conversation. “Oh,” he says looking down at himself with realization and a huff of laughter.

“Nothing.” Bucky shakes his head with a smirk. “But maybe you should check with Darcy tonight and see what's going on. You have more pull over the team than I do. And way more pull over her.”

“Yeah right,” he bites out sarcastically. “I'll bring it up tonight after dinner when everyone goes to bed. She's usually the last to leave.” He sighs, worried about what Darcy is getting herself into and whether or not she has a way out. Steve knows Darcy didn't choose this life. She's just too stubborn to leave the people who have chosen it alone. He glances at his watch hoping to make it back in time to catch her in the common kitchen area as she prepares thermos of coffee for herself and Jane but he knows he's already late and she's probably down in the labs by now. When he looks back up he notices a small mixed group of men and women running on the other side of the street. They're all staring at him.

“Trash bag.” Bucky adds while giving him a quick once over in Under Armor shirt.

“Nah. Trash bag's not gonna hide how good-looking I am now.” He says with a canary grin as he gets a head start running to the back to the tower.

“She's right!” Bucky yells after him, picking up his own pace. “You are a little shit!”

 

________________________________________________________________________________

 

After several incredibly boring meetings with Maria Hill and Coulson the only two members of the team willing to negotiate with SHIELD were Natasha and Clint. Steve didn't mind running around all over the world risking his life in order to ensure others' safety. In fact he didn't really know any other way of life. 

But that doesn't mean he doesn't have reservations about working for SHIELD. The last thing Steve can even think of at this point is aligning himself with that organization- no matter how many times Coulson begs or Fury nags. It helps that Clint and Natasha don't try to sway his mind. They understand the thin line SHIELD is teetering on after the Insight scandal and data dump. Natasha is still getting backlash from several governments for that rogue decision. 

Tony and Bruce flat out refused to attend any meetings discussing the contracts SHIELD is trying to sign everyone on. The first time the discussion was brought up in a meeting Tony interrupted Fury with over the top comical laughter before flipping everyone the bird and walking out. Bruce excused himself and followed him shortly afterward.

And this evening they were no closer to working with SHIELD than they were three months ago. He didn't think he could get migraines. That was proved wrong when he had to sit through another three hour meeting of Natasha and Coulson arguing with each other and Clint enjoying the bitter back and forth too much to stop it.

So by the time Wednesday Dinner was starting he was already wondering how many bottles of ibuprofen or horse tranquilizers it would take to dull the throbbing behind his eyes. All he wanted was to eat three orders of takeout whatever-it-is-tonight and see Darcy. She always made him feel better and had the perfect way of pulling him out of his mind. He longed for the way she would fill dinner with her entire day and every thought that crossed her mind. It helped him forget his own problems.

But when he and Bucky finally made it down to the common kitchen she was no where to be found. Bucky immediately sought out Natasha after noting Bruce was still in his labs. The two ex-Russian spies instantly united to annoy Clint as much as humanly possible. The second he spots Tony dishing out lasagna from a huge pan on the counter he makes his way to the mechanic.

“Evening Cap,” he greets him over his shoulder. “How'd the meeting go?” Steve quirks an eyebrow up at him. “You're right. I don't care. Darcy and Pep say I have to practice being nicer or I'm going to end up a cantankerous old man.”

“Right. Anyways, I was wondering if you noticed that Bruce has been in his labs a lot more than usual lately?” Steve watches as the shoulders on the man in front of him tense for a fraction but his face gives nothing away. It's enough to know that whatever comes out of Tony's mouth next will be a deflection or a misdirection.

“I didn't realize you were missing him.” Tony adds with a cocked eyebrow raised in a sign of mockery. “I think he's actually working. You know? That thing I'm paying him to do?”

“I imagine Darcy would have dragged him up here already.”

“The kiddo's not feeling too hot tonight.” Tony pushed a plate filled with lasagna into his hands and levels him with an even stare that says he'll be watching him. “Go sit down and eat, Steve.”

Steve nods once and turns to make his way to the large oak table off to the side of the room, a plan already forming in his head. As he comes upon Bucky and Natasha he places the plate in front of his friend. As he bends over he gently whispers in Bucky's ear. “Need a distraction. _Now_.”

Bucky wastes no time in creating a diversion and Steve kind of wishes he could stay and enjoy all the chaos is friend is creating.

He pitches the plate of lasagna at the far wall and as it shatters into pieces of food and ceramic he yells out something in Russian that has Natasha's eyes go wide before he slumps over limp in his chair. Tony and Clint vault over the table to help Natasha bare his dead weight. Steve is instantly out of the room and running down the hall to the stairway. 

“Is this one of the Winter Soldier Reprogramming hiccups?” Steve hears Clint's voice just before the door to the stairs closes behind him. 

He skips down steps three a time until pushing past the door to her floor. He can feel his teeth grind his jaw sore as he hurries to her door. Something about the conversations he had with Bucky and Tony doesn't sit right with him. The second he's standing on her _**“Hello, is it me you're looking for?”**_ doormat he begins banging on the door. 

“Go away!” At the sound of her voice he steps back in confusion. That's… not what he was expecting from her. The last time Darcy had a head cold she would cuddle up next to anything warm with a beating heart. Not turn away from them. If Steve knew one thing about Darcy Lewis it is that she is not a solitary creature.

“Darcy? What's wrong?” He can feel his worry ascend to greater heights the longer they are both separated by this stupid door. “Jus tell me what's wrong. Or let me in. I can help you.” He tries to jiggle the handle but it doesn't give. “Please, Darce.”

“Nothing's wrong, Steve. Just go-” He interrupts her again by pounding harder on the door until it swings wide open and he's met with a glare. “Are you really about to break my door down because of your separation anxiety?”

He sees the change in her instantly. Darcy's eyes are glassy and red-rimmed, lacking their regular sparkle and her nose looks red and irritated. The usual creamy paleness of her skin is ghostly white and goose pimpled. Little wisps of dark curls are plastered to her face and the sides of her neck with sweat. Patches of wetness on her shirt shows how much she's perspired and he's surprised she's not dehydrated from all the fuild she's losing. She looks like a wet, sickly mess.

She does not look fine at all.

He reaches for her when she pitches forward to make a grab for the doorframe to keep herself steady. Darcy strikes out with a the speed of a cobra to slap his hand away while muttering about mother hens under her breath.

“I'm fine, Steve. Just a case of the sniffles.” She manages a broad smile up at him but he doesn't buy it for a second.

“I don't think this is the sniffles.” He frowns down at her. 

“Listen. I don't feel like I can hold a conversation with anyone above the age of two right now so how bout you go back upstairs and let me sleep this off?” Darcy reaches up to gently pat his shoulder. He notes the heaviness of her eyes and how her lids keep dropping as she leans against the threshold. 

“You look like you're going through a withdrawal.” He points out acerbically which makes her glare at him even harder than before. In seconds she is chest to chest and hissing up at him, moods jumping from one plane to another. As she takes up his space he steps back further into the hall. Her sleepy dullness gone and instantly replaced by a snapping electricity.

“Let me stop you right there before you say something else you're going to regret. One of these days you're going to _thank_ me. Like down on _both knees_ , thanking me. So don't spoil it by being an ass! It's best if you just leave me alone right now.” 

He stares down at her speechless, mind pulled apart in several directions. The way her soft warm chest feels against his. How the little mark between her brows deepens when she glares up at him. The confusing words she's saying which might be the result of a fever. As he's still watching her, shell-shocked, she groans once and grabs her mouth before hurriedly turning back into her quarters and slamming the door shut behind him. He can hear the patter of feet and then the sound of heaving and vomiting. 

Steve tries to jiggle the door knob and is shocked when he finds she locked him out again. And then he notices it. The dull ache on the top of his hand where she slapped him. He pauses to stare at down at it as if he's imagining the feeling. 

“Jarvis?” He asks quietly while backing away from Darcy's door.

“Yes, Steven?” The AI sounds loud in the empty hallway over the roaring stillness in his ears.

“What's going on with Darcy's vitals right now?”

“I'm sorry. I can not divulge that information as it would be a breach of privacy.”

The roaring gets louder. That's not the usual response Jarvis has ever given him regarding anyone’s health status.

Steve absentmindedly retraces his steps back to the stair well and completely forgoes the rest of dinner, sick with anxiety. He reaches his quarters and crawls into bed to spend the rest of the night staring at the ceiling and waiting for tomorrow when he can shake the answers out of the people who have them. Namely, Tony and Bruce.

That morning he sleeps in and is awakened later when his phone buzzes on the nigtstand then plays the notes for a new message.

 

**Jerk**  
are you up yet grandpa?

 

**Punk**  
You were on to something. Darcy was weird last night.

 

**Jerk**  
she seems pretty normal to me right now. she just made me a cup of coffee. 

 

Steve is out the door and racing down the stairs to the common kitchen area in less than fifteen minutes after quickest shower and he'd ever taken his entire life. He can't help but wonder what Darcy is doing going to work when she looked like death warmed over last night. He has half a mind to drag her back to her room and tie her to the bed until he steps into the kitchen area.

The smell of fresh coffee instantly hits him when he comes upon the sight of Darcy filling up a thermos with a carafe in her right hand and sipping from an owl shaped mug in her left hand. Next to her, Jane is carefully pulling out four poptarts from the toaster. 

At the kitchen bar Bucky catches his eye and makes a _“go over there and do your thing”_ gesture to the women. Steve shrugs his shoulders and vehemently shakes his head in the negative. He doesn't have a thing- he doesn't know how to do any of the things Bucky is capable of. While Bucky is jerking his head in their direction and mouthing at him to _“do it”_ Darcy clears her throat and turns around with an amused crooked brow.

Steve is struck by her. She's so beautiful with the way the morning light shines in through the ceiling to wall glass windows. Her skin is back to its original creamy smoothness and she's no longer shivering from a constant chill. The smile spread across her lips is wide and friendly but there's something different about her. Her glow doesn't seem natural- she doesn't feel natural to him at the moment.

They stare at each other for what seems like an eternity. He can feel the heat rise to his face in a blush but she stares right back at him until Bucky clears his throat. Steve looks to his friend gives him a minute nod. 

Jane leaves muttering something about boyfriends and broken mattresses.

“You're looking better this morning,” he says appraisingly. Her eyes flick once over to Bucky before quickly settling on him again with a narrow gaze and a saccharine sweet smile.

“Like I said; it was nothing. Probably just one of those twenty-four hour bugs people get from time to time.”

“Really? Hmmm.” He moves past her to pull a glass out of the cabinet and then over to the refrigerator to pour himself some juice. He lets the near silence marinate the room with tension, the only sounds are Bucky finishing his cereal. She ignores them both and returns to the thermos, screwing the lids on tightly and tipping them over to check that they won't leak. After he's gulped all the juice down he leans against the counter and stares at her. If she looked any more tense her bones would be vibrating. “Don't you know it's considered a crime to lie to Captain America?” She stiffens under his gaze.

They both ignore Bucky's snort of laughter behind them.

“What would I have to lie to Captain America about?” She shrugs and instantly the tension is gone and filled with her familiar teasing tone. “Besides, you aren't Captain America to me. You're Steve. Just a guy who likes to curl up on the couch with me to play in his coloring books and on occasion enjoys throwing himself out of planes into the ocean from over twenty thousand feet before taking out an entire fleet of pirates. Cool story, bro.”

“How do you know about that?” He frowns down at her, crossing his arms to look as imposing as possible even though she keeps pulling the rug out from under his feet. She shrugs once.

“Natasha's little public information party? I know all your little secrets, Steve.” Darcy reaches up to fondly pat his cheek in a condescending manner. “That's why you can never intimidate me-”

“I'm not trying to intimidate you, Darce.” He steps forward and gets in as much of her space as she'll allow without backing up. “I'm just trying to figure ou-”

“Darcy?” Jarvis cuts off their moment just before he felt like he might have started to lean into her palm. He's never been so thankful for the AI.

“Yes, omnipotent computer friend?” She says aloud, her eyes steady on his own. He takes fraction of a second to memorize the little specks of brown that dust the blue of her irises. He takes a steady, even breath when she backs up and pulls away from him half a step.

“Agent Coulson is here. He, Dr. Banner, and Sir are awaiting your arrival in Sir's lab.”

And then he sees it. Darcy's tell. Her eyes widen for a moment and her mouth slackens as her tongue wets her bottom lip. His heart drops when he realizes she's nervous. 

“Thanks, J. Tell them I'm on my way now.” Her tone is gritty and she clears her throat as she quickly turns away from him to gather the thermos'.

“As you wish.” 

Steve watches her with a heavy heart as she rushes out the room without a goodbye.

“Well.” Bucky breaks his reverie as he rounds the bar to place his bowl and spoon in the dishwasher. “That was awkward. And kind of hot.”

“She's lying.” He says quietly, still staring at the doorway she just fled through.

“Yeah, that much was obvious. Among other things.” Bucky sounds unhappy. “What are we going to do about it?”

“We're gonna get ourselves a spy.” 

“As long as it's not Hawkeye. Guy's super annoying.”

 

 

They immediately head down to the gyms in search of Natasha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shall we keep going?


	3. Honest Observations

They find Natasha on the mats holding a yoga pose. Her eyes are closed and it's the most peaceful Steve has ever seen his friend. That's about to end real quickly and he feels a little bad about it. Off to the corner of the mats Clint is sweat soaked and lying on his back presumably sleeping. Bucky glares at the man on their way to Natasha.

 

She peeks an eye up at them and Bucky grins down at her. “G' morning, dollface.” Natasha quirks a delicate eyebrow up at him but smiles before focusing on Steve. Steve frowns at Bucky. The worst person his friend could flirt with is Natasha. He has nothing against her- she's one of the first people who stood up for him and he knows there's more to her under all that catlike disinterest. She's a good person trying to find a way out of her dark past. But in Steve's opinion she's not right for Bucky. All that would ever result between the two ex-Russians is meaningless flirtation.

 

“Oh uh. You two look like you're up to no good,” she casually remarks while walking over to the edge of the mat to slip on a pair of sneakers. 

 

“I need your help.” He pulls the Captain America tone out and her eyes widen a fraction before flicking over to Bucky- who in turn playfully wiggles his eyebrows at her. “No, it's not that. Something else is going on and I need someone with an in.”

 

“Is this one of those things that's going to sound really stupid but piss me off later?” 

 

“Probably.” He pointedly looks at Clint's spread eagle form on the mats. “We might have to be discreet about it.”

 

“Guys, I'm a spy. That's the maximum level of secrecy as you can get,” Clint drawls out from the floor.

 

“If we need you we'll let you know.” Bucky bites out with a growl. 

 

“I liked you better when you were quiet and menacing.” Clint pouts before rolling to his feet and leaving the gym like an angry toddler.

 

“Okay,” she says staring at Clint's retreating form. “Now what do you boys need?”

 

He needs a way in now that Darcy knows he's watching her. He needs someone to sneak in under her radar and get to the root of his worries. He needs someone who cares about Darcy as much as he does and he knows Natasha dotes on the woman. Natasha has a commitment to the truth and the people she cares about. She's exactly what he needs right now.

 

“Have you noticed Darcy's been spending a lot of time with Bruce lately?” He tries to broach the subject carefully.

 

“Well, she helps manage the labs.” Natasha shrugs on a sweatshirt and grabs her water bottle as she listens. “It's kind of in her job title.”

 

“Yeah? Did she study under Bruce or anything because she seems to know an awful lot about his work.” She turns to say something but quickly closes her mouth and jerks her head to the hallway. Bucky nods in understanding and follows her immediately when she turns on her heels to leave. Steve trails after them in tandem.

 

Once they're inside the cab of the elevator she presses the red-lit button to her floor and then pushes several other buttons. Two-five-two-two-five-six-eight-eight. When the cab lurches up she pushes the emergency break button and finally turns to them. 

 

“We're secure. There are no microphone or camera feeds currently working. And I _have_ noticed Darcy hasn't been with Dr. Foster much these past few weeks. She and Tony have been working with Bruce quite a lot lately. She doesn't train in the gym with me before bed much anymore either. It doesn't seem like she's doing anything suspicious though. I was under the impression she was taking on more responsibilities in the labs. What's got you so worried about her, Cap?”

 

“Whatever she's doing with Tony and Bruce is big enough that Coulson is in involved.” He frowns at the ground, picturing her quick retreat just an hour earlier.

 

“Well, that's doesn't really mean anything. Coulson has been bothering Tony and Bruce to sign a contract with SHIELD for months now. He's not making any leeway but he and Tony don't totally hate each other. Coulson and Darcy are pals, too. They get on like a house on fire.” She crosses her arms and leans against the railing of the elevator cab.

 

“Okay. So they always happen to be in Banner's lab at the same time? With a black out on all security feeds and Jarvis. Yeah, that doesn't tingle my spy senses at all.” Bucky snorts with derision. “The fact is that she's working with Bruce on a level that she has no prior education to. I'm pretty sure she's helping him with something concerning the serum and it's effects on unnatural cellular reconstruction.”

 

“Huh?” Natasha is struck speechless and her eyes pop wide open. “Are they working on the Erksine formula? I didn't think anyone had access to it. What the hell are they doing toying around with that?”

 

“Your guess is as good as mine.” Steve shrugs.

 

“That's odd.”

 

“Yeah- and so is this.” He pushes back the cuff of his sleeve and lifts his hand up to show off the now lavender turned yellow bruise.

 

“A bruise?” She questions with mild interest. “You collect bruises like kids collect stickers.”

 

“True. But this is Darcy's work.” At his words her head tilts and her frown deepens. She looks quickly to Bucky who nods once as he leans back with his arms crossed. Her green eyes narrow and turn back to inspect the bruise.

 

“Did she happen to hit you with a grade four titanium baseball bat lately?” 

 

“No,” he shakes his head with a small huff of laughter. “She slapped my hand like I was some bad little school boy.”

 

“That sounds hot.” When Natasha and Steve send Bucky a withering glare at his comment he shrugs his shoulders with a naughty smirk. 

 

“I'll look into it immediately.” She assures Steve before pressing the button to her floor and pitching the elevator back into movement. When it reaches her floor she steps out but holds the doors open with her hand. “What are you planning to do if the answer is something you don't like?”

 

“I won't know what to do until I know what the answer is.” He replies honestly. She nods once and then turns to leave. The elevators close bathing the two in silence and artificial light. Bucky punches in the number to Tony's labs and Steve shifts awkwardly from foot to foot. He can feel Bucky's eyes on him and it makes electric shivers run down his spine. 

 

“I'm thinking I'll try to ask Darcy out tonight.” Bucky says evenly. Steve isn't sure if it's the momentum of the elevator or his friends' words that cause his stomach to twist into knots. 

 

“Now? With all this covert under the rug stuff going on?”

 

“Sure- why not? Might get some info out of her if she drops her guard a bit. I think I'm still charming enough to pull that off. You did say I should go after her.”

 

“Yeah.” He wants to bang his head back against the steel wall of the elevator when his throat constricts and his voice comes out nothing more than a whisper. “She's perfect Bucky. You'll be great together.” He offers a smile but it doesn't feel real. Something that looks like disappointment flashes across Bucky's face but Steve doesn't pay it any mind. He just looks down at his shoes and tries to focus on not curling his fingers into fists. 

 

“You're right- she is perfect.” Bucky says just as the doors reach the designated floor. 

 

Steve trails behind Bucky at a slower pace and he's happy to find that he can hear music coming from Tony's space. The door to his lab is open and he's sitting over his work table peering into a small circuit board through a magnifying glass. The music cuts off alerting him to their entrance. “You guys need something or do you wanna watch my handsome backside while I work?”

 

“Darcy 'round here somewhere?” Bucky cuts to the chase while Steve takes his time to look at everything on Tony's tables. Nothing out of the ordinary. Circuit boards, wires, tools, sawed off pieces of metals. Torn apart machines. Tony's workspace reminds him of a graveyard for robots. When Tony spins around in his stool to face them Steve quickly comes back to attention. 

 

“Why?” Tony asks curiously. “What do you need her for?”

 

“Looking to take her out for a night. Why? You her keeper or something?”

 

“Or something,” Tony responds quickly while eyeing Steve as if he's done something wrong already. “Darcy'll be back in a few. She went to check on Bruce and make me a new pot of coffee.”

 

“That's fine,” Bucky says with an easy smile as he leans against one of the abandoned tables. “I'll just wait right here for her to come back. You don't mind, do ya?”

 

“Nope. Suit yourself.” 

 

“She seems a lot better than she did the other night.” Steve says conversationally. Tony's mouth purses and the corners of his dark eyes wrinkle a bit as they narrow for a millisecond. He nods and gives Steve a friendly smile reminiscent of the ones he gives nosy reporters. 

 

“She does. Must have been one of those twenty-four hour bugs or something, right?”

 

“Or something,” he mocks Tony with a glare. One side of Tony's mouth curls up into a smirk and Steve just knows he scratching the surface of something big. It's actually agonizing to know something is going on and he's purposefully being left out in the dark about it. The man in front of him seems to enjoy it too which only serves to piss him off more. Steve rolls his eyes and looks away to the door where he can hear approaching footsteps. Darcy sweeps into the room easily with a purposeful look at Tony that Steve can't decode.

 

“Are you guys following me?” She looks back and forth between him and Bucky she as places a giant thermos of coffee at Tony's work table. 

 

“Nah- we're just stalking you, sweetheart.” Bucky's playful smile widens flashing her his canines. Her head tilts as she regards his laid-back posture leaning against a work table and then over to Steve's stiff stance of a rigid back and clenched fists. He notices her watching him and forces himself to relax. 

 

“Oh. Well that's a little scary coming from a guy who was an expert in the art of stalking. Among other things.” 

 

“Among other things,” Bucky is quick to agree with a wink. Steve's mouth goes dry when she smiles at him and he realizes they are flirting. Tony frowns and spectates the interaction with interest.

 

“Is there any particular reason why you're paying little ol' me so much attention?” She asks carefully, most likely remembering the short interrogation she received up stairs earlier that morning. 

 

“There's more than a few.” He shrugs as she comes to his side. Steve watches as she crosses the room, gravitating towards Bucky to continue their flirtatious banter. Something akin to the pain of a punch to the gut twists in his stomach. He looks away from the two and finds that Tony is staring at him the same way he stares at his digital boards when he's trying to figure out some impossible answer.

 

“And why is that?”

 

“Because I want to take you out. That little hipster bar on the corner downtown has karaoke tonight. How about you teach me some more about boy bands and let me buy you a drink.”

 

“Like on a date?” A quiet stillness settles in the lab. Steve can't help but turn back around to watch her reaction and he's a little surprised to find her looking at him. She covers it quickly with a polite smile to Bucky and nods slowly.

 

“Sounds great. Not really in the mood for boy bands much these days, though. I think we need to teach you about the emo music of the late two-thousands.”

 

“Emo music?” Bucky repeats with a frown.

 

“Trust me. It's so far up your alley it's stupid. You kind of look like the lead of MCR.” She says while sizing up his person. 

 

“Does he have a metal arm too?” He asks sarcastically and she snorts with laughter.

 

“No. But it would be kind of bad ass if he did.” She nods to herself, admiring the image in her mind. “Pick me up at six.” And then she turns to leave, patting Tony's shoulder once on the way out. Before she disappears out the door she turns around with a smirk. “Is this going to be one of those end of the night kiss-dates or a fist bump friend-date?”

 

Steve takes a deep breathe and waits for his friend's answer. Bucky looks at him once with a scrutinizing eye before continuing his conversation.

 

“If you wanna lay one on me at the end of the night I'm not going to stop you, sweetheart.” Bucky winks at her as she rolls her eyes at him and turns away. Steve listens to her footsteps as they fade away further down the hall and back to the elevator. 

 

Steve is staring at the doorway when Tony clears his throat bringing the attention back to himself. He's looking back and forth between them. “Is this going to be a thing? Because I don't like these sorts of things.”

 

“What? Dates?” Bucky innocently questions. “Is that because you tend to skip those or because you've never been on one?”

 

Tony coldly glares at Bucky as his sips from his thermos but refuses to be goaded by the other man. “You laugh now. But I'm talking about this-” he gestures to the doorway and the two men in front of him. “inevitable disaster.”

 

“Disaster?” Bucky laughs at him. “It's karaoke. Not an engagement.” 

 

Just as Tony's mouth opens to shoot something equally sarcastic everyone's pockets vibrate as their Starkphones send out a little alarm. Steve pulls his out first and taps in his security code to unlock it. “There's a hostage situation in Tbilisi.”

 

“That's in Georgia. 'Bout seventy people held hostage in a theater.” Bucky scrolls through the reports on his phone. “Should we suit up, Captain?” 

 

Steve shakes his head in the negative while Tony and Jarvis work on pulling up cctv feeds from the streets and finding current media coverage. The last few meetings he had with Fury and Coulson made it clear that the Avengers were not to make a move in any crisis situation until they were called upon. Back and forth arguments about being held accountable for quick decisions and ones actions ring in his ears and he sighs at the useless feeling that settles over them. 

 

This is why he's unsure of the contract SHIELD is offering the team. Under contract the Avengers would only be allowed to move under SHIELD's authority and that doesn't entirely sit well with him. Coulson is doing his best to clean out Hydra but even Steve knows he's frustrated with the conduct with which orders are being carried out.

 

“No orders to assemble yet. We have to wait until Georgia authorities contact us. We don't want to overstep here.” Steve runs a hand over his face as he watches Tony's screen of cops and cars and crowds arrive the theater. Tony nods and then goes back to his circuit board, abruptly giveing them a dismissive. 

 

Steve shoots out a text to the team to warn them they might be called out while he and Bucky make their way out of the lab. The second they're out of the room a door swishes in place and locks behind them.

 

“There's a secret ops unit is Russia called the Alpha group-”

 

“Do I want to know how you know that?” Steve winces at the thought.

 

“Let's just say they wouldn't exist if I hadn't been running around trying to blow shit up.” Bucky gives him a consoling pat on the back. “They'll be called in before we do. They're good and they know what they're doing. Those people will be safe.”

 

Steve nods and tries to believes Bucky's words. Its hard to be the one person built for saving the world when it doesn't particularly need your help. He pushes the elevator button to go back up to the common floors. Just as they enter and the doors slide shut behind them Bucky's phone pings with a text alert. He pulls his phone out and frowns down at the device. “Fuck.”

 

“What's wrong?” 

 

“Darcy just canceled our date. Said something critically important just came up and asked for a rain check.” His frown deepens as he shoves his phone back in his pocket. 

 

“We have to figure out what's going on with her, Bucky.” Steve leans back and waits for the elevator to arrive on the floor. “There's just so many inconsistencies with her lately. It looks suspicious.”

 

“Yeah. Besides who would turn down a date with me?” Bucky shrugs and shakes his head. “There's obviously something going on there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting harder to explain. Hopefully Nat will have some solid information for out boys next chapter. 
> 
> On a side note: which of you will I be seeing at Wizard World?


	4. Trying to Explain the Unexplainable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are AMAZING!  
> Thanks so much for reading and leaving funny and inquisitive comments! I really enjoy all the guesses you guys have made and responding to them. Thanks again!
> 
> On with the story!

Darcy's been at her grandma's in the Midwest for three days- according to Tony and Jane. Which could be true because she's talked about her Mimi before so Steve knows the woman actually exists. But all he's done in the past few days without her is follow his usual routine with Bucky and monitor Bruce and Tony. They do nothing out of the ordinary but he's sure someone will slip up. The problem with secrets are keeping them secret. But all the inactivity is is driving him up the wall. 

 

And he's still not any closer to figuring out the mystery wrapped around Darcy. Natasha went off the grid the same day he spoke to her about Darcy. Steve doesn't know if that means she's trying not to get caught or if she's found something more problematic than he first thought. And then the lack of a mission has him sitting around and stuck in his head.

 

The crisis in Tbilisi was taken care of quickly and quietly all in a night. Bucky is sure it was the Alpha Group since there is no trace of who took down the attackers and none of the people saw anything. 

 

“That's just what they do, Steve. They go in, get the job done, and roll out. They don't like to stick around and answer questions.” Bucky explained to him last evening.

 

“I get that. It's just weird that no one saw anything. I get that they were in a dark movie theater but how do seventy people not see anything?”

 

“I told you,” he rolled his eyes at him. “That's what they do and they're good at it.”

 

Which is good. Steve's not complaining but honestly what is there for him to do when no one needs saving? Get a job? Continue his education? It seems so normal and easy that it must be impossible. Nothing has ever come easy to him before.

 

He's sitting in his living room flipping through three hundred channels for the second time when his phone buzzes on the glass coffee table. An unknown number is trying to reach him and he takes one full second to decide whether answering or not would be a good idea. 

 

Nothing else is happening so he accepts the call.

 

“Hello?” He asks quietly.

 

“Don't worry. It's Natasha. So, I went to upstate New York to go through Tony's database and rummage around through some of the files SHIELD was able to keep encrypted after the public got a hold of everything.”

 

“I wonder whose fault that was?” 

 

“Hush, Steve. I don't _have_ to help you with this, you know.” Her voice takes on a haughty tone like she has something over him. Which she does most of the time and that makes Steve roll his eyes. He can tell when Natasha has an ace up her sleeve.

 

“Did you find anything at all?”

 

“I may have found something,” she taunts him.

 

“And?” 

 

“And I want you to promise me that this stays between us- and Bucky because I know you'll end up spilling the beans to him anyways. Darcy is part of something. I'm not entirely sure how but I have a good idea.”

 

“What the hell is going on, Nat?” He coaches himself to take a deep breath and relax. His hand is digging into the fabric of his jeans and his jaw his turning sore from clenched muscles.

 

“Just promise me, Steve.” Her voice is soft this time. And that's all he needs to know that she's hit something big and important. She's asking him not to act rash or do anything stupid. It's a hard promise to make. 

 

“Fine, I promise.”

 

When she doesn't respond immediately he's worried the line went dead. He pulls the phone away and looks down at the screen to find that the call was disconnected. He's seconds away from throwing his phone over his shoulder when it buzzes and beeps in his hand. It's the same number Natasha used to call him and she's texted him an address and a fifteen minute time limit. 

 

He purses his lips and rolls his eyes. If the Black Widow was anymore mysterious she would be nonexistent.

 

The door to the apartment opens and he turns to find Bucky walk in giving him an odd look.

 

“You okay, Stevie?” Bucky asks curiously on his way to the kitchen. 

 

“Yup. Just bored.” Steve nods and immediately pockets the cellphone. 

 

Bucky gives him an amused once over and grins at him. “Oh. Well, if that's you're only problem why don't you go for a walk and see if there are any cats stuck in trees.” His friend laughs at himself as he makes work of picking an orange out of the fruit bowl on the kitchen bar and begins peeling it. It's such a normal sight Steve never thought he'd see again that it nearly breaks his heart. His shoulders untense and he smiles back at him.

 

“I'm not really a cat person.” Steve crosses his arms over his chest.

 

“Haven't been much of a people person lately either. Keep it up and people might just think Captain America is a hermit.” He says in a shocked tone- his eyes going comically wide. “I can already see the headlines: Captain Recluse Doesn't Play Well With Others- actually that seems pretty accurate right now.”

 

“Well I'm glad to see that even though you lost your sanity and an arm your asshole humor is still perfectly intact.” Bucky lifts up a metal middle finger and his grin widens at Steve's exasperation. “So here in a few hours I gotta run an errand.”

 

“Don't worry; I won't go crazy and kill everyone while you're gone.” Bucky rolls his eyes as he washes his hands and then heads down the hallway to his room with his peeled orange.

 

“Great,” he says gathering his key ring, ball cap and a jacket from the hook by the door. “Because that would really suck.”

 

As soon as he makes it out the tower he tugs the ball cap low over his face and pulls the lapels of his jacket up high around his jaw. Natasha once taught him to be inconspicuous, which is a hard art to learn when one is six feet and two inches tall. 

 

He passes several kiosks and venders, weaves between hurried businessmen and hoards of nannies with small children. Once at a stop light an older girl stares at him with curious admiration and only looks away when her chaperon reminds her that staring is rude. She salutes him and waves goodbye as he winks and crosses the street ahead of her. 

 

The further he walks the less glamorous his surroundings become. The buildings become more and more outdated and the people are too busy to give him any notice. It reminds him of his old stomping grounds more than anything else has in the century. When he finally comes across the address he frowns as he walks into the small one story building.

 

A few patrons are leaning against the bar at the back of the room and the smell of stale smoke hangs in the air even though no one has a cigarette lit. His eyes adjust to darkness and the blown neon advertisements as he searches for her familiar form. She's in the furthest booth in the back with her sunglasses on and sipping from a sweating glass. She smiles up at him when he sits in the seat across from her.

 

“Really? A bar?” 

 

“It's happy hour,” she explains with a shrug of her shoulders and a long purposeful sip from her drink. “And I love an expertly made Bloody Mary.”

 

“So what did you find out?” He cuts to the chase and she nods her head falling back into work mode. Natasha sets a manila file on the table in front of him and he thumbs through the first few pages quickly. He can feel his brows bunch up and his shoulders tense when his eyes land on a familiar image. 

 

A picture of the shining vita-ray chamber makes him stop thumbing through the papers and images. He's immediately hit with the memory of Erksine's words and the intricate pain he once felt all over his body hits him all at once.

 

“What's this? Why is- God, what's going on, Nat?” His voice comes out in a hurried slur of panic.

 

“Turn to the next page.” He does as she orders and his eyes quickly take in the writing and schematics for some type of machine. Words are scribbled in margins and measurements are hurriedly written next to the drawing of the machine. But there's no doubt about what he's seeing. It's a new vita-ray chamber. 

 

“Several countries have tried to recreate the Erksine formula. Russia is the only one to have the most successful results. Bucky and I are proof of the fact. We're stronger, have faster reflexes, we process information better, we're able to retain and recall any information we take in, and our cellular regeneration speed is insanely fast due to a higher metabolism which also makes us immune to things like sickness and poisons. But everything we're made to be is small in comparison to you. We were given the serum intravenously over the period of a week.” Natasha reaches across the table and flips over the page. She takes a long drink from the glass while his eyes span over a page of notes in Howard's handwriting. “You got the whole she-bang, though. The serum was dispensed to you in a modified oral form and then intravenously for over an hour before you went into the chamber. That, coupled with the effects of the vita-rays made you the perfect soldier. You're everything we are- only better made. Because you had the vita-rays. Russian scientist couldn't work out how Erksine and Howard worked the machine-”

 

“Gas and radiation.” He says absent-mindedly. “And electric current. The gas was released first- felt like every breath of air I took was killing me and then I got the biggest headache and sense of vertigo. I thought my brain was going to explode and they almost stopped until I told them to keep going. Then the current was bumped up and it felt like I fell into the sun. My body was changing but it just felt like I was being ripped apart instead.” He looks up to see the horror struck look on her face until she masks it into an empathic smile.

 

“Lucky me, I guess.”

 

“That first picture was a different machine. Did someone figure out how to build another one?” He flips back to picture and points at it.

 

“I think Tony did.” Natasha nods once.

 

“Tony built another vita-ray chamber? What for?” Steve runs his hand through his hair an a frazzled gesture.

 

“The question isn't _what_ for- it's _who_ for.” She says before sliding another manila file to him on the table top. 

 

He flips the thick cover of the folder open and comes face to face with Darcy Lewis' Stark Industries employee identification photo. 

 

The next page is her short resume and a study of her academics with several blacked out redacted lines. The next page is a brief family history and a list of relatives. The next page is a formal SHIELD document written by Clint accounting her role in New Mexico when she interned with Jane and Thor was banished to Earth. The next page is a copy of an x-ray he almost flips past until his eyes scan the date and the fact that he's looking at a brain and not an arm or a leg.

 

“That's a CAT scan of her brain done in the Stark Industry medical office.” Her voice is soft and he immediately knows something's wrong with the picture even though he doesn't know what to look for. She points to a spot and his eyes are drawn to a large, dark gray area that looks out of place. “That's a tumor. From what I read in reports it was deemed inoperable and prognosis stated that radiation therapy wouldn't help much since it was in such an advanced state. Other treatment options would prolong her life but only for a few months and it wouldn't cure her. She would basically finish life in a vegetative state.”

 

Steve sits back in his seat and closes his eyes. Natasha stops talking and he can hear her get up and walk away to the other side of he room. He feels sick to his stomach, like he knows he going to throw up and his body wants to but it's just not going to come up and relieve him. He's hit with a sudden wave of nausea and anxiety that it takes everything to remain upright and not lay down in the booth. 

 

He thinks about the people he's lost and left behind. He thinks about the people he has now. He can't imagine life without Darcy's laughter or kind words on bad days. He can't stomach the thought of a day where she doesn't exist. Steve swipes at his forehead, beads of sweat itching his skin. He opens his eyes and gives a nod of thanks when Natasha places a big glass of icy water in front of him before sliding back into the booth across from him with ease.

 

He takes large gulps of water and if he were in his former body he'd surely have a brain freeze. He sits back, breathes until he can feel himself relax, and nods for her to continue.

 

“The signs were all there. Those mood swings that made us laugh and the muscle twitches and spasms she blamed on a lack of sleep. The nausea and vomiting wasn't a bug- they were all symptoms.” Natasha explains as she takes Darcy's folder and thumbs through a few pages until she finds a copy of an admitting report to the SI Med Bay. “This report says was taken to one of the emergency offices after she collapsed while working. I followed her day in the security feeds of the tower the date she had the CAT scan. She was working with Tony- helping him with a piece on the suit when she just slumped in her stool and fell over. She hit her head on the ground and Tony took her to Med Bay to get a scan and figure out what was wrong with her. That's when they found the tumor.”

 

God, his chest ached. If could just hold her he'd feel better.

 

“Is she dying, Nat?” He felt his face crumple and his throat shrink as he voiced the question.

 

“She _was_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So one of you guessed correctly on one of the reasons why. You're a smart bunch!  
> Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea in my head for a while now so last night I sat down and planned out a few chapters.  
> Sooo, lets see how this pans out, shall we?!
> 
> Hope y'all like it!


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